A Pastoral Tale

Long before anyone thought to count the passing moments, a mischievous spirit filled a small vessel with some pretty sick stuff, all of the very worst things in the world, in fact. The spirit gave this magical vessel to a beautiful maiden and placed them both in an unsuspecting young shepherd's garden.

The young shepherd was very lonely, since there weren't too many people around back then, so he was quite happy to see the lovely girl, and he had no scruples about opening her magical gift, since scruples hadn't been invented yet.

Soon all the very worst things spilled back into the world, but the shepherd and the maiden didn't care.  They didn't even notice because they were too busy getting to know each other better.

The spirit became so jealous of their affection for each other that he cursed them to forever endure three of the very worst things that had been released from the vessel: decay, boredom, and worst of all, hope.
But the nasty spirit's plan backfired. He soon realized that his curse only made their happiness sweeter.
'Sickos!' He thought. 'Let them punish themselves with their own will and desire, then!'

And they did.